by Elyse | Feb 17 | Leadership
Do you feel like no matter what success you have in your life, someone else always looks more put-together, more organized, has more clarity, and seems to have everything together? Do you ever wonder what they are doing day in and day out that leads them to have clarity, success, and organization? Career-driven women depend on daily habits to reach and maintain their success. So, what are the five practices of successful career-driven women?
1. They don’t believe everything they think.
Humans have tens of thousands of thoughts per day, and only some thoughts are helpful or even accurate. Knowing that you don’t have to believe your thoughts, primarily if it is not serving you, you can direct your thoughts to be more helpful in creating success. To see more about this, check out the blog post, Asking Better Questions.
Click here for the free guide, 3 Ways to Feel Less Overwhelmed at Work.
2. They ask for help.
Successful women are fearless in asking for help and seeking out coaches or mentors when needed. Having someone you can go to when dealing with a challenge or self-doubt can be priceless. By having someone else look at the problem differently, they can help you see new solutions or guide you through it.
3. Successful women lead themselves.
They know where they are going and don’t wait for other people to start. They permit themselves to pursue their goals and dreams. They take responsibility for their lives and lead themselves through their challenges and struggles. They look to themselves first to answer problems. They take action and don’t make failures mean anything about their worth.
4. They are optimistic.
Successful women know they will get farther with an optimistic mindset than a negative one. They think highly of other people and avoid gossip, and they think well of other people and also think well of others. This thinking makes them collaborative, and they can quickly move their projects along. People enjoy working with them, and they enjoy others.
5. Successful women are continually improving themselves.
They are constantly growing and challenging themselves. They know they don’t know everything and are always looking to improve. They are open to learning new skills and having a beginner’s mind. They are fearless in investing in themselves and their education and know there is always more for them to learn.
A Final Note
Every practice that a successful, career-driven woman does is available to you today. You can start practicing these habits and mindset shifts and seeing results in your life in no time. Pick one to try out, commit to it for at least three weeks, and see how much changes for you.
by Elyse | Feb 9 | Leadership
The better the questions you ask yourself, the better results you’ll get in your life.
Your brain is a problem-solving machine. If you give it a problem, it will work to find an answer to the problem posed.
This is why the questions you ask your brain are so important, and it gives your brain focus and direction. This focus and demand are what your brain perceives as essential to you, so it will start looking for and finding evidence of whatever questions you ask.
In a way, it acts like Google. Your search for something, and it WILL find an answer for you. The most common way people use this against themselves is by asking themselves and their brains the wrong questions.
If you ask your brain a question, it will answer. So, if you request your brain;
Why am I so broke?
Why does nothing ever go my way?
Why am I always passed over for a promotion?
Your brain will search and start looking for more evidence for those questions, and it will then reinforce these conditions in your life. But you can also use this brain functionality for your benefit. Like asking your brain, how can I be less overwhelmed at work?
Click here for the free guide: 3 Ways to Feel Less Overwhelmed at Work.
The Benefits of Asking Better Questions
One of the first ways that asking better questions will benefit you is that your brain will start searching for and noticing opportunities for you. It can help lead you to better results.
Better questions can also help direct your brain to notice more of the positives and the negatives, which can improve your mood.
You can put your brain to use and use it to solve problems that exist for you by asking better questions instead of unhelpful questions about the issue.
Asking better questions and asking the brain questions you want to know the answer to can help direct your brain to a specific target so you spend less time thinking about unproductive or worrisome thoughts.
Tips for Success in Asking Better Questions
Frame your questions in a positive. Your brain will answer the questions you give it, so if you ask it negative questions, it will find answers.
Why am I so broke? can be changed to where are there opportunities for me to make more money?
Why does this always happen to me? can be changed to where are things going well for me right now?
Why am I always passed over? can be framed more positively by asking how can I get a promotion this year?
Ask questions that you want the answer to. This helps give some emotion to your questions which will help your brain deem finding the answer as essential, and the desire to get a solution will help you stay focused and committed to your question.
Ask the question you want the answer to repeat until you get the answer. Keep asking your brain your question repeatedly until it gives you an answer. Sticking with one question will help your brain stay focused on getting the solution instead of starting down multiple paths but never getting to the end of a course.
What to Do If You’re Struggling
- Continue repeating just one question over and over to yourself every day until your brain gives you an answer
- Try getting your brain to answer your question through free writing. Write your question at the top of a blank page and see what comes to you through writing.
- Be clear on if you want the answer to your question. If there is some upside to your brain not giving you a response, consider why that might be.
- Follow your nudges. The answer may not come to you in an obvious way, and it might feel more like a slight nudge.
Better Questions
You can direct your brain to work for you. You can ask your brain better questions, and it will find answers for you. It will also help you find more evidence to support more supportive beliefs and have you notice things that will help you.
A way to frame the questions above to better questions would be:
How can I quickly make more money?
Where are things going well in my life right now?
How can something in my life go even better?
What can I do to get a promotion?
Your brain will work to find the answer by asking questions like these.
If you have a goal in mind, you can continuously ask yourself how you can reach it, and your mind will come up with answers and solutions. Your mind can also help you discover something. So if you are not sure what you want, you can ask your brain a question like, what is available for me to do as a career that will make my life more fulfilling?
Your brain will then search until it finds an answer for you.
by Elyse | Jan 23 | Leadership
Here is a list of the 13 best leadership tips.
- Be an active listener. Being an active listener means fully listening to the other person and not thinking about what you will say next. It also means repeating what you heard them say back to them to ensure that you heard them correctly and that the two of you are talking about the same thing.
- Show empathy for those around you. As a leader, there will be times when you have to deliver hard news or critical feedback, and it is during these times that others will be looking to you for guidance. Showing empathy for the people around you and what they are going through will help you connect to them more and be seen as a fair and reasonable leader.
- Always conduct yourself with class. Just because you are in a position of power doesn’t mean you have free reign to disrespect others. Class is one of the most critical elements of outstanding leadership.
- Set aside time on your schedule to focus on your essential tasks. You will have more responsibilities, meetings, and people wanting more from you. You need to block time off for when you can focus and finish your important projects.
- Communicate clearly. Say what you mean and mean what you say. How you communicate will be one of the most important things you do as a leader. You want to ensure that you are clear in communicating expectations, visions, and priorities to those around you.
- Stay away from gossip. Someone who is a leader should not gossip about those around them; it looks unprofessional and could lead to negative feelings if those you talk about find out.
- Make sure to attend meetings and be on time. This should be obvious but needs to be clarified. If you have a meeting with someone, show up to the meeting on time. Try not to cancel or be late to your appointments; if you are, communicate that as soon as possible.
- Be slow to change your decisions. People want a leader who knows where they are going. Constantly changing your mind confuses people and makes you look like you don’t have a vision for the future. Be thoughtful with your decisions but not to the detriment of moving forward.
- Be open and willing to learn new things. Technologies change, platforms change, and there will never be a time when you have mastered everything there is to master, and you will continue to move forward with each change by learning new things.
- Don’t be emotionally reactive to situations. Take a pause. Try to step back and see the case for what it is. Refrain from making decisions from this place. Try to separate your choices from the emotions that you are feeling at the moment.
- Be accepting that change is always happening. Adopting the mantra “change is good” will help you feel better when change inevitably happens,
- Have a precise separation between your work and personal life. Keeping your personal life separate from your work life will help you have better boundaries around your time and availability and give you space to focus on your hobbies, family, friends, and other things outside of work.
- Manage your mind. By managing your thoughts and feelings, you will be able to think more clearly and strategically, make better decisions, and have less emotional reactivity. Calming your mind is one of the most important things you can do as a leader.
by Elyse | Dec 22 | Leadership
One predicted trend for the next year is making space for joy.
There will be increased interest and focus on prioritizing and cultivating a mindset of joy.
How much would your life be improved if you made space for joy?
Would you be calmer, and more present with your family?
Would you be more resilient when it comes to challenges at work?
Would you be friendlier, more agreeable, and have more harmonious relationships?
To make space for joy, here are some things you can do:
1. Clean out your space
To make room for something new, you need to get rid of whatever is in its place now. There is a great analogy about needing to move your old couch out of your home before you bring in your new couch.
This is making space for something newer and better by letting go of the things that are no longer serving you.
You can do this with your physical space by cleaning out your closet and junk drawers. You can also do this with your mental space by letting go of old thought patterns that are no longer serving you.
Take an inventory of what is going on around and intentionally decide on what you want to keep with you for the new year and what you want to let go of.
Resources:
2. Spend time doing something you love
Taking the time to pick up an old or new hobby can be a great practice for cultivating joy. By doing something that you love, you can engage yourself in new and creative ways that feel good.
By taking the time to do something that you love, you will spend more time automatically in a state of joy.
3. Practice the feeling of joy in your body
Making space for joy in your life will lead to other positive outcomes as well. But, it is not always easy to feel joy or to sustain the feeling of joy.
When you feel unadulterated joy, it can bring a sense of foreboding. Brené Brown calls this foreboding joy. It is the familiar pattern of being uncomfortable feeling joyous because of the fear that is it not going to last and something bad is about to happen or that the other shoe is about to drop.
By making space for joy, you can practice holding the feeling of joy for longer and teaching your body that it is safe to feel this way. This way, you will be able to feel joy for longer periods of time and be able to enjoy the feeling of experiencing joy instead of being fearful that something will happen that will take the feeling away.
4. Reminisce about times in the past that you have felt joy
One way to experience joy now and also get your body used to feeling joy is to remember times in the past when you have felt joy.
By recalling those memories, you can re-experience the joyous feelings in your body and you can practice feeling joy without the fear of what will come afterwards.
5. Honor Your Decisions
Making space for more joy in your life by honoring your own decisions. Take some time to think about what you want, why you want it, and get to know yourself on a deeper level so that you can be more comfortable making decisions that you truly want.
Resource:
This means listening to your desires for your life instead of doing what other people want you to do or doing things out of guilt or obligation. By doing things that you want to do and honoring your own decisions, you will naturally feel more positive emotion in your life which will help cultivate joy.
A Final Note
Joy is a feeling that is currently available to you right now in this moment. My hope for you is that you take these suggestions and find a way to make space for joy for yourself this year.
by Elyse | Dec 16 | Leadership, Planning
Leaders need to reflect on the past year as the year ends. If you are planning, strategizing, and setting intentions for the next year, it is essential to reflect on the past year before making new plans for the future.
Why Reflect on the Past Year
There are many reasons to reflect on the past year. Some of those reasons include the following:
- creating space between this year and next year
- addressing things that need to be changed
- celebrating what has been accomplished
- planning for next year
Reflecting on the past year creates a separation between the current year and the following year. It is a crucial distinction in your mind to close one year before going into the following year, especially if you want to make significant changes.
Reflecting on the past year also helps you decide what you liked about this year and what you want to change moving forward.
Resources:
Reflecting on the past also helps you pause and recognize the things that you have accomplished and take a moment to celebrate those accomplishments. It also gives you a framework for creating a plan for the new year.
How to Reflect on the Past Year
You can use this exercise to reflect on the past year of your life, the past year for your company, your team, or your career.
You can start by just thinking about the past year. The things you did, the places you went, the people you saw, who you spent time with regularly, what your habits are, just anything but keep it contained to within the past calendar year.
If you need help jogging your memory or more specific questions, you can use some of the journals prompts from 75 Leadership Journal Prompts for Career-Driven Women. Or you can use your calendar to remind you of what you have done in the past year.
Then, start asking yourself specific questions to reflect on the past year. Ask yourself:
- What went well last year?
- What am I proud of?
- What didn’t go so well last year?
- What do I want to improve?
- What things do I want to continue doing next year that I am already doing?
- What do I want to let go of?
- What was the most significant accomplishment in the last year?
- What was my favorite memory of the last year?
- What brought me the most joy in the last year?
- What brought me the most pain in the last year?
- What do I want to try in the new year?
- If it was one year from today, what would I be happy with accomplishing?
- How are things different than they were one year ago?
Could you spend some time thinking about specific answers to these questions? It can also be helpful to list out what you know to be true about your circumstances as separate from how you feel about them.
Example: I’m in a job I hate with people who don’t respect me. This would be your thought versus the facts of the circumstances: I’m an account executive at X company. I have worked for this company for three years and have yet to get a promotion or a raise. I feel resentful.
Plan for the Future
After you have taken time to think about the past year, your accomplishments, what has changed, what has stayed the same, what you want to continue doing, and what you want to change, you can start planning for your next year.
- What is my vision for the new year?
- What is my current plan for reaching my vision?
- What will stop me from reaching my goals?
- How can I put a plan in place to overcome the things that will stop me?
A Closing Note
Reflecting on the past is important for all leaders. It is important to take some time to think about what is working, what is not working, what you want to change, what you want to try to do differently and how you could go about making those changes.
If the past year didn’t go the way you wanted it to, that doesn’t mean that next year has to go that way too. You are capable or making a plan or changing and of reaching your goals.
Make sure you grab the free guide: 3 Ways to Feel Less Overwhelmed at Work if you want to think differently about your role at work.
by Elyse | Nov 21 | Leadership
Journaling can help to increase your self-awareness and emotional intelligence. It can give you insight into what you excel at, where you struggle and where you want to improve. It can provide insight into your mind and emotions and show you patterns you keep repeating so you can choose to change them. That’s why I’ve created this list of 75 journal prompts for career-driven women about leadership.
Journaling can be a powerful tool for creating the future you want instead of letting life happen to you on autopilot. This can be especially important when going through a significant life change, like getting a new job.
It can help you reflect on the past and decide what you want for your future.
Journaling can also help you process uncomfortable emotions like insecurity, doubt, or hesitation so that you can show up empowered and confident. It will also help you think more critically about what is in front of you and can help you discover solutions instead of focusing on problems.
75 Journal Prompts for Career-Driven Women
- What did I succeed at in my last role?
- What did I struggle with in my last role?
- What method of communication do I prefer to receive?
- What form of contact do I like to use?
- In what way do I like to receive feedback?
- What qualities or things did I like about my favorite manager?
- How well have I separated myself from my last role in my mind?
- Am I aware of any blind spots I may have come into this new role? What are they?
- How would I describe the leadership style I hope to encompass?
- Am I more prone to being very detailed-oriented or thinking big-picture?
- Will my preferred method of thinking hinder me in my new role?
- What are my thoughts about time?
- Am I good at managing my time?
- How would I describe the relationship I have with myself?
- What are my biggest time wasters at work?
- What do I turn to at work when I am uncomfortable or out of my depths?
- What is my process for making decisions at work?
- What qualities do I value the most in myself when it comes to working
- What qualities do I value the most in my colleagues when it comes to working?
- What qualities do I value the most in my managers at work?
- What projects am I least and most excited about in my new role?
- How do I interact with others when I am stressed, frustrated, or busy?
- What are my current thoughts about managers and bosses in general?
- Who do I want to be as a manager?
- Who am I as a manager now?
- Who do I want to be as a colleague?
- Who am I as a colleague now?
- Who do I want to be as a leader?
- Who am I as a colleague now?
- How can I get from where I am to where I want to go?
- What are my thoughts about meetings?
- Are meetings purposeful or a waste of time?
- Here’s how I think meetings should be led and run…
- What are my thoughts about one-on-one meetings?
- How do I feel about conducting one-on-one meetings?
- What was the most impactful one-on-one meeting I’ve ever had?
- Are there any past experiences I had as an individual contributor that I want to ensure I don’t recreate for my direct reports?
- What are my general assumptions about people on the whole?
- How do I feel about work in general?
- How do I feel about my company in general?
- If I could change anything about your company what would it be?
- What kind of culture do I enjoy at a company?
- How is the experience of culture I enjoy at a company created?
- What am I hoping to accomplish in this new role?
- In what ways am I am uniquely qualified for this position?
- What new initiatives would I like to implement in this new role?
- How do I handle people who try to push their problems onto me?
- How do I handle telling people no?
- Where do I struggle to make decisions?
- Where do I struggle to plan?
- Where do I struggle to get organized?
- Where do I struggle to follow through?
- Where do I struggle to stay on track?
- Where do I struggle to communicate?
- What do I currently know about my new team?
- What have others told me about my new role, team, and company?
- What observations have I made about my new team, company and role?
- Are any of my observations of my new team in any way an assumption?
- How did my current team get to where they are now?
- What system do I have or use for capturing information that comes my way?
- How do I handle other people when they express that they are stressed or frustrated?
- How adept do I feel at conflict resolution?
- At what scope am I most comfortable planning: hourly, daily, weekly, monthly, quarterly, yearly, or longer?
- Who are my allies in my new role?
- What do I need to learn before I start my new role?
- Is there anything I need to do before I start my new role to make it a smooth transition?
- What do I want to create in my new role?
- How can I create more time?
- How can I overdeliver in value for my company in my new role?
- How do I want to show up every day?
- How do I want to feel about my new role?
- If things at my new role were going well, what thoughts would I be thinking?
- What leadership skills do I already possess?
- Do I think of myself as a quick decision-maker or indecisive person?
- Am I someone who can stand behind my decisions?
If you are looking for more support around feeling less overwhelmed at work, grab this free guide: 3 Ways to Feel Less Overwhelmed at Work.
A Final Note On Journal Prompts for Career-Driven Women
These 75 journal writing prompts are designed to help you get to know yourself, reflect on what went well in the past and what you want to intentionally bring with you to the future. You are capable to becoming the leader you want to be. I believe in you.
